The Present State of Things:
Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results, as the saying goes.
And here I am, contemplating if I’m insane; wondering how I ended up in this lukewarm state of stagnation. I sleepwalk through life and perform the same perfunctory routine, waiting for challenge to strike. I miss the concept of a challenge. The type of challenge that necessitates a will to derive a solution, that forces the development of deeper understanding, that wholly consumes your mental capacities, that induces feverish dreams unveiling an elegant revelation come morning.
I’m bored. I have ephemeral passions for nearly everything fading in and out of everyday life. But, such vigor is short-lived. A sudden inkling to check the deals section of the WSJ is nullified within minutes. Tocqueville and Rousseau inspire a fleeting curiosity to understand profound questions of social organization, but dissipates after brief skims through Brittanica. I anxiously thumb through books I’ve been meaning to read for months, half-engaged, concerned that my time is being ill-spent. But where else could it be spent? Why do I feel so consistently, inexplicably rushed? Why do I fear commitment?
This lack of commitment is a reflection of a lack of vigor. Floating aimlessly through life, I’m waiting for some intellectual frenzy to whip me into a storm. When will this storm come? Will it come again?
And so, the circumstances call for deep, patient, and deliberate reflection. This website is a partial attempt to hash out my conflicting thoughts through precisely such reflection, while hopefully presenting some other useful knowledge along the way.
Welcome to a slice of my mind.